Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

OT: not using Facebook

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    OT: not using Facebook

    I frequently think about deleting my Facebook account - for a variety of reasons - but every time I even deactivate it for a time, I run into problems. Because FB use is assumed, companies/groups use it as a standard form of communication, which makes it hard to do away with completely. I know some of you do not use FB. Have you found a way to deal with the general assumption that "everyone" is on FB? For example, the pool we belong to uses FB to announce random changes to their hours. How do you handle those situations? (Wait, do you *gasp* CALL them?) I'd really like to set myself free, but I keep getting pulled back in for information. Non-users, do you find that you miss information that is broadcast on FB? (A local homeschool event or a sale, etc) Or do you have friends who keep you in the loop?
    Melanie
    2021-2022: 13th year homeschooling. 8th MP year.

    A, 12th grade: online classes with MPOA and TPS
    E, 10th grade: 10th grade core; math with MPOA, biology at co-op
    B, 7th grade: 7th grade core; math and comp with MPOA

    #2
    Re: OT: not using Facebook

    Melanie,

    I am one of those who never joined FB, and therefore have never missed it... If we have missed something, I guess I have not known, so it's not really a big deal. I check actual websites for information and that seems to do just fine.

    I LOVE not having another time-zapping "thing" to keep up on, and I also LOVE being out of the radar of so much drama that happens on FB et. al. No one is immune to the "image-making" temptation of FB; it is just that much easier to avoid that temptation by simply not being on it.

    I know my family members are on it, and they are more "in touch" with each other because of it - posting photos and giving updates and whatnot. That is one aspect that sometimes makes it seem like it would be nice to have an account. But that thought is ALWAYS short-lived, and then I go back to being grateful I have never had to deal with it.

    AMDG,
    Sarah
    2020-2021
    16th Year HSing; 10th Year with MP
    DD, 19, Homeschool grad; college sophomore
    DS, 17
    DD, 15
    DD, 13
    DD, 11
    DD, 9
    DD, 7
    +DS+
    DS, 2

    Comment


      #3
      Re: OT: not using Facebook

      Our local pool doesn't change their hours often enough for it to have ever been a problem. (I don't even know if they post things like that on their facebook page because I have never checked.) About the only time they close early is when there has been lightening in the area---but I kind of know that from looking at the sky, not their facebook page. If the sky looks gray and stormy, then yes, I call first. IF I did attend a pool that randomly closed or changed their hours, then yes, I would simply just call them before I came. It wouldn't be a big deal.

      For other places, most of the time, I pull open websites to check hours, events, etc. I have NO problem finding things to do as a homeschooler without facebook.

      Do I possibly miss out on random homeschool events/places/classes/podcasts? Possibly. However, I sort of like it. That is one of the reasons I am off of Facebook. The problem for me has never been finding things to do--(or to buy, or to listen to, or to watch, or to read...)--the problem for me has always been sorting through all of the information, events, blogs, curriculum choices, etc. I am much happier not having things shoved down my throat and thrown at my face a million miles per hour...and if I want VERY specific information (example: art class for homeschoolers, chess club, speech and debate, information on memoria press, etc.)--I do an internet search and find the information that I actually need. Sometimes it leads me to their facebook page, but mostly I can check these without logging into anything. And if I can't, then too bad for them! (That is poor marketing on their behalf.)
      Cathy aka The Attached Mama
      2019-2020
      DS 12, 7th Grade
      DD 11, 6th Grade
      DS 5, K

      Comment


        #4
        Re: OT: not using Facebook

        I have a friend who is only in closed Facebook homeschool groups who has politely told every one else not to friend her.

        I have some work-related Facebook posting I need to do for the homeschool community, so I do have an account, but almost no friends outside my older kids who have left home, 4H, and homeschool and gluten-free groups. ETA- you can also "snooze" people for 30 days. Maybe "snooze" every non-essential person/ organization for that long and see how it goes?
        Last edited by bean; 07-18-2018, 11:47 AM.
        Bean. Long time MP user. Almost retired homeschool mom and university faculty/ librarian.

        I apologize in advance for my typos and grammatical mishaps.

        DD (17) Graduated!
        Mechanical Engineering

        "School Administrator" to niece (9): MP 3A

        Comment


          #5
          Re: OT: not using Facebook

          I was on FB for a time but closed my account and actually deleted it (there is a way to do this!). I did this about 4 years ago and have not missed it. I am put off sometimes by companies who only communicate via FB (announcements, sweepstakes entries, feedback/questions, etc.) or who require a FB account in order to login, but that's the cost of cutting ties with social media. When it comes to holiday hours, upcoming events and such I just go directly to the website or call (library, restaurants, community center). Again, it's just a different way of doing things. I don't find it too difficult because I'm just used to it now.

          I do get funny looks and lots of *helpful* advice when I'm forced to admit that I don't have accounts on any social media platforms (Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, etc.) - people assume that I *want* to be there but am afraid of privacy issues. That's just a small part of the issue. Mainly, I know myself and I know how easily it is for me to go down rabbit holes only to emerge hours later with neglected children and a brain addicted to checking my "likes"...or worse, to know things about people that cause me to judge them in a way I never would had they not shared their political beliefs or professed their love of bathing in mayonnaise in a very public forum. *weary laugh*

          It's a very personal decision. If you feel the urge to let the account go, give it a try. It takes a bit of time to develop a new habit, so give yourself a good week or two. If you find it's too inconvenient or that you're missing important information or announcements, then you can easily go back.
          Last edited by Mary; 07-18-2018, 05:25 PM. Reason: subject verb disagreement. Had to intervene before things got ugly.
          Mary

          DD15 - 9th core + CLRC Ancient Greek I & Latin IV + VideoText math
          DS12 - 7th core + Novare Earth Science + CLRC HS Latin I + VideoText math
          DD8 - SC level 2

          Comment


            #6
            Re: OT: not using Facebook

            Originally posted by bean View Post
            I have a friend who is only in closed Facebook homeschool groups who has politely told every one else not to friend her.

            I have some work-related Facebook posting I need to do for the homeschool community, so I do have an account, but almost no friends outside my older kids who have left home, 4H, and homeschool and gluten-free groups. ETA- you can also "snooze" people for 30 days. Maybe "snooze" every non-essential person/ organization for that long and see how it goes?
            I didn't know about the "snooze" option. That's kind of funny! I have unfollowed a ton of people, particularly the over-posters. Which kind of makes me wonder: what's the point? If they don't see my posts and I don't see theirs... It would be nice to be friends with only a few family members and friends -- I bet there are about 20-30 people I'd actually like to hear from. But unfriending that many people would probably be offensive to some and I'd hate to hurt anyone's feelings.

            Sometimes I think the answer is to log in infrequently. But sometimes I'd like to delete the whole shebang and not think about it at all.
            Melanie
            2021-2022: 13th year homeschooling. 8th MP year.

            A, 12th grade: online classes with MPOA and TPS
            E, 10th grade: 10th grade core; math with MPOA, biology at co-op
            B, 7th grade: 7th grade core; math and comp with MPOA

            Comment


              #7
              Re: OT: not using Facebook

              Originally posted by melaneesa View Post
              I frequently think about deleting my Facebook account - for a variety of reasons - but every time I even deactivate it for a time, I run into problems. Because FB use is assumed, companies/groups use it as a standard form of communication, which makes it hard to do away with completely. I know some of you do not use FB. Have you found a way to deal with the general assumption that "everyone" is on FB? For example, the pool we belong to uses FB to announce random changes to their hours. How do you handle those situations? (Wait, do you *gasp* CALL them?) I'd really like to set myself free, but I keep getting pulled back in for information. Non-users, do you find that you miss information that is broadcast on FB? (A local homeschool event or a sale, etc) Or do you have friends who keep you in the loop?
              I have found the same thing you've found. It tends to be assumed that you're on Facebook, and many places use that as a primary form of communication. I've spent periods of time with my account deactivated, but I always go back because I miss being able to quickly double check things (like hours!), connect with neighbors, and see upcoming events. Plus, when my husband is traveling, facebook messenger is an easy way for us to communicate without the delay of email. I do find that breaks make it easier to just go through there to grab what I need and it's not as much of a time suck, so even when I don't stay away I feel that it does help to get breaks now and then.
              ~Michelle

              DD 13 (MP 8 - 4FL and Ref/Con through MPOA)
              DS 11 (MP 6 w/MPOA)
              DS 5 - MP K (My first Kindergartner with MP!!!)
              DD 2 - Board Books and Chaos

              Comment


                #8
                Re: OT: not using Facebook

                I deleted my account about a year and a half ago. Very happy, no regrets whatsoever. It was a big time waster in my life. I’m enjoying living and doing things in real time, and feel much more focused on whatever it is I’m actually doing. Mentally, I feel more peaceful. I “miss out” on some gossip, which is perfect for me. I research and visit real websites instead. Ditching facebook was one of the best things I did for myself in the recent past. I highly recommend it!
                Last edited by chapulina; 07-18-2018, 04:22 PM.
                Ora et labora,
                Sandra

                DD (17) - grade 12 (Divine Comedy, Precalculus, AP Latin, Senior Thesis, Fundamentals of the Faith, American Government, and Economics through MPOA Diploma Program)


                DD (13) - grade 9 (Algebra ll, Fourth Form Latin, Logic l & ll, High School Comp. ll, through MPOA. Aeneid/ History of the Romans, Geography lll, and Biology at home)

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: OT: not using Facebook

                  I was briefly on Facebook, but felt for me it was more of a distraction than an enhancement to my life. I was feeling pulled by a lot of Facebook notices regarding local activities, neighborhood updates, etc., yet I didn't feel more connected to people around me. I decided after the last news of Facebook leaking personal data (I realize these updates appear in the news almost weekly these days) to go cold turkey and delete my account.

                  I don't miss being on Facebook and haven't really experienced any negative implications associated with being off of social media. On the contrary, I feel more relaxed. I spend very little time online for social purposes, and find myself calling friends and arranging get togethers to stay in touch instead. I started reading more again. My neighbors mention updates that I haven't heard as I don't get the FB updates, however, they also mention neighborhood drama and gossip I don't hear either. I do get some funny looks when I admit to never having seen Instagram, Snapchat, and whatever else is out there. I know these add a lot to the lives of some folks, but for me, they add "noise" in a way that I find stressful. Bring on the real human contact! (The irony of posting that statement to an online forum has not escaped me )
                  DD 15 - MP 9

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: OT: not using Facebook

                    I opened an account year to download some pictures of my daughters trip to Rome with lukeion because she and my mom failed to take any pictures. I have never had a page or friends or wharever one does on facebook. Public pages are viewable without an account. I have missed some AHG events, but uaually someone lets me know. I dont usually lack for things to do. As the treasurer I have come to board meetings only to find out I missed out on lots of "drama". I dont deal well with drama and I might be tempted to say that I should actually regret. This forum is as close as I come to social media, and I stay because it is so focused, polite, and encouraging. I cant miss something I never had, but nothing about it inspires me to start.

                    Good luck on discerning the future status of your relationship with Facebook :-)
                    Dorinda

                    Plans for 2021-2022
                    15th year homeschooling, 12th year with Memoria Press
                    DD College Freshman
                    DS 10th grade - Lukeion Latin and Greek, Vita Beata Greek Dramas
                    DS 8th grade - Vita Beata Literature
                    DS 3rd grade - Vita Beata Literature, Right Start F, First Form Latin

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: OT: not using Facebook

                      I keep my account because I have older kids and I like to use messenger with them and I update extended family on the health of family members. I only follow friends and family, but if someone friends me I accept them. I'm active in homeschool facebook groups but not as a poster. I found a good balance although, like you I have thought about deactivating plenty of times. I just don't care about most people's day to day- my life is crazy enough.
                      Homeschooling since the dark ages of 2001

                      14 yo son- MP 8th grade
                      Four graduates (20,23,25,27)

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: OT: not using Facebook

                        Haven’t been on FB for years. I opened a Pinterest acct when it first came out because a friend told me how great it was (it wasn’t). I promptly closed it. Twitter: ditto. I’ve looked at other people’s public albums on Instagram a few times over the years but found it empty and vain (because we are all supposed to get excited about what you had for dinner? Or how you look in a bikini?). I have no idea what goes on on Snapchat, but I’ve heard conflicting things.

                        But mostly, I’m a snob about social media because it causes way more problems than it solves. How many flame wars were started because of something someone said (or said poorly) on Facebook or Twitter in a drive by comment? How many kids have been bullied by trolls who have nothing better to do than creep anonymously into social media and try to destroy someone they envy or despise? It’s also a great big contest (in many cases) to win some sort of award for the shiniest or most interesting life. I find it all so mean, devoid of substance and artificial. I am basically the opposite of all of that.

                        Bottom line: if I want to talk to someone, I’ll pick up my iPhone. Social media is a time toilet.
                        Last edited by Anita; 07-20-2018, 06:15 AM.
                        “If I should fall even a thousand times a day, a thousand times, with peaceful repentance, I will say immediately, Nunc Coepi, ‘Now, I begin.’.”

                        ~Venerable Bruno Lanteri
                        ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
                        Wonder Boy 14 ... MP5 + R&S Math 6
                        Joy Bubble 12 ... MP5 full core
                        Cowboy 10 ... MP5 + R&S Math 4
                        Sassafras 6 ... MP1
                        All … SSPX Catechesis

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Re: OT: not using Facebook

                          "Social media is a time toilet." Yes! This. Right here.

                          I do have a FB account I re-activated a year ago after a 5 year break, mostly for the purpose of support groups. This is the rub for me. Years back, support groups were gathering in Yahoo Groups for dialogue. Today, it appears to be FB. I'm so torn. My husband has never used any social media, still uses an old-fashioned flip phone and is a happy camper like that. We are pretty close to being Luddites.

                          SusanP

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: OT: not using Facebook

                            My husband asked me to give up FB 4 years ago. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I used to call it DepressBook, bc 1 minute into scrolling through the highlights of others' lives, I would completely reframe what I thought was the most amazing time/trip with my kids and compare it to our friends' professional photographer shots in the woods or beach while on vacation in Sweden or Machu Pichu....or whatever! And DH would get so frustrated when dinner couldn't be served until I had the perfect shot of a dinner plate or 30 photos were taken of my unenthoused children. Now, I love the anonymity I have...a life lived between me and God, shared with family, sprinkled with neighbors and people in our community, framed with God's grace. I don't have to wonder if I'm offending people because I never have to wonder if I should say something face to face. And sure I miss out on all kinds of deals, closing alerts, niche support groups, etc. I also trust God that it's His will, and He will send me the relationships, deals and teachable moments our family needs.

                            In particular, there's a homeschool bookstore that only releases sale alerts in a closed FB group. So, I just call or go in...and the Lord has provided those happy coincidences of the exact sale we needed and a great relationship (i.e. first dibs) on books we need.

                            Finally, I cannot describe how enjoyable conversations are again. If you listen in at church, people don't even ask how you're doing anymore. It's just, "I saw; I know!" No one wants to listen to the stories they've seen play out in word and picture down to what people packed, ate & brought home. I love the feeling of being surprised and intrigued.

                            I wrote this from the rocking chair of a farm where I took my kids peach picking. They were sticky sweet and perfection. There's this strange angst I still get from not taking a picture and sharing it with loved ones...until I realized I had an amazing time, and so did my kids, and that is enough.
                            Mama of 2, teacher of 3
                            Summer: First Start French I
                            SY 22/23
                            6A, teaching TFL & CC Chreia/Maxim in group, and Koine Greek
                            MP2 w/ R&S Arithmetic 3


                            Completed MPK, MP1, MP2, 3A, 4A, 5A
                            SC B, SC C, SC1 (Phonics/Math), SC2's Writing Book 1

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Re: OT: not using Facebook

                              Originally posted by enbateau View Post
                              My husband asked me to give up FB 4 years ago. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I used to call it DepressBook, bc 1 minute into scrolling through the highlights of others' lives, I would completely reframe what I thought was the most amazing time/trip with my kids and compare it to our friends' professional photographer shots in the woods or beach while on vacation in Sweden or Machu Pichu....or whatever! And DH would get so frustrated when dinner couldn't be served until I had the perfect shot of a dinner plate or 30 photos were taken of my unenthoused children. Now, I love the anonymity I have...a life lived between me and God, shared with family, sprinkled with neighbors and people in our community, framed with God's grace. I don't have to wonder if I'm offending people because I never have to wonder if I should say something face to face. And sure I miss out on all kinds of deals, closing alerts, niche support groups, etc. I also trust God that it's His will, and He will send me the relationships, deals and teachable moments our family needs.

                              In particular, there's a homeschool bookstore that only releases sale alerts in a closed FB group. So, I just call or go in...and the Lord has provided those happy coincidences of the exact sale we needed and a great relationship (i.e. first dibs) on books we need.

                              Finally, I cannot describe how enjoyable conversations are again. If you listen in at church, people don't even ask how you're doing anymore. It's just, "I saw; I know!" No one wants to listen to the stories they've seen play out in word and picture down to what people packed, ate & brought home. I love the feeling of being surprised and intrigued.

                              I wrote this from the rocking chair of a farm where I took my kids peach picking. They were sticky sweet and perfection. There's this strange angst I still get from not taking a picture and sharing it with loved ones...until I realized I had an amazing time, and so did my kids, and that is enough.
                              WOW! This is absolutely beautiful. Thank you for speaking truth into my soul, encouraging and inspiring me! Bless you.

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X